Sorry pal, you're a cute kid but you just don't leave an impression. It's a pretty well known fact that the pity friend is always the bass player. Try to do something outrageous, to get yourself some attention. Maybe modeling.
"If anyone had a heart
They wouldn't turn around & break it
And if anyone played a part
They wouldn't turn around & fake it"
Lou Reed, 'Sweet Jane', 1970
You are Sterling Morrison! Hey there hotstuff. Not only can you sweet talk the ladies with your dissertation on "The Grapes of Wrath," but everyone knows that a good looking guy is 1000 times sexier with a guitar in his hand. Rock on, Sterl, rock on.
The great thing about that poll is that us guys would be happy with virtually all the options. Except maybe Doug...but I always loved his bass playing anyway so who cares